Monday, February 14, 2005

Waiting for robbers

I'm home today, very very sick and hoping that no criminals come racing through my back yard. Happy Valentine's Day! My millions and billions of germs and I are very happy together. I hope you're happy with someone special too.

posted by art @ 7:38 AM

Friday, February 04, 2005

my future

This is an excerpt from my horoscope for the day:

Tonight: Take a brisk walk around your neighborhood. You might meet someone interesting.

DUH. But will that interesting person want me to pay her for sex? That's the real question.

posted by art @ 1:38 PM

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Calling All Crooks

Not much new to report here. My landlord left the front door open (not just unlocked, OPEN) the other night. All night. That was exciting for me. Especially since I'd just caught that hardened criminal (PERP) prowling around the premises. (Think about this: perhaps the perp would have left something nice for me instead of stealing anything. He left his jacket last time.)

Luckily for all of us, the landlord is going to Berlin for a much-needed 10-day vacation. Vacation from what? Exactly.

posted by art @ 7:04 PM